The Goblins

There are twelve of them and they are all physically identical, except for Hats who has a knit pullover hat on. They lanky boney little humanoids that would be four feet tall but walk/stand hunched over so they are closer to three. They have green skin, balding heads with a ruff of kinky grey hairs, foot long pointed ears, a long pointed nose the curve downwards, and a large bushy squirrel tail in the back. They have long spidery fingers, long bulbous feet, and are quite dextrous like little monkeys. They wear no clothing at all, except for Hats, but that’s fine because they’re smooth like dolls. They constantly argue amongst themselves, trying to decide how they should feel about things and what they should do about things, occasionally lapsing in to slapping and punching and screaming, except for Hats who is generally happy to do whatever as long as he doesn’t have to try very hard. At any one time they are either afraid of Mr. Potato-head and avoiding him, angry at him and plotting to kill him, jealous of him and planning to trick or humiliate him, fed up with him and searching for somewhere else to live, or doing whatever he tells them to do so The Bullies don’t savagely beat them. The only things that unites them is their love of making small children cry and be miserable.

Since the battle against lord potato head the goblins have sworn a magical binding oath to serve Miranda as their new lord. There are only twelve now since on was slain during the final battle. During a battle for dominance Michiko fatally wounded Hats but then used her medicine pouch to heal him. Rather than let the other goblins know he had been bested he has convinced them he is immortal and can never die. He is now their undisputed leader, after miranda. They goblins live in Castle Treehouse now, much to Stichwort’s annoyance. The girls have given each goblin a name, but in response Hats has given them goblin names that they use in almost all circumstances other than talking directly to the champions. Their names are as follows, goblin name first, given name second

Grub was the first goblin to swear the oath and was not present when Hats had his fight with michiko, so he is the only goblin that does not respect his leadership. He is also the only goblin that seems motivated more by the champions’ kindness rather than merely fear of them.

Hats the Unkillable
stupid – dood
ugly – hurk
stink squib
worthless -splat
bad-breath -dirt
disgusting -kibble
moron -wark
half-wit -wiggle
bastard -wonky
idiot -bonk
shit-head -goober
most terrible disgusting horrible scum of the earth

The Goblins

Champions of the Treehouse demonsquidgod demonsquidgod